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oneminuteglitches: vol 1. antifragile

by Samiir Saunders

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1.
antifragile stronger when you break me disproportionate strength to tension from disorder this is not the end state stasis complacent wind comes don’t build a wall build a windmill back to your comfort zone you keep running far too afraid to shatter broke my iron house on the cliff where the waves paint rust as a mural
2.
I’m shattered in a glass house need to get to sleep stone’s throw from a bad dream -- we are hiding from the glass
3.
I been in my feelings you’ve been hiding mirrors from yourself boy chainmail glitters in the mirror-light jade sky blooms on the ceiling I was in the mirror that you looked away from I know that you see me chem trails fade underwater lost thoughts wash onto beaches sworn oath sinks in the mirror-light minerals fall from the ceiling your eyes turn away from the green sky while I lie deep in my feelings yeah, I’m in my feelings honesty is healing I was in the mirror when you shattered me you were in pieces
4.
fuck it, I’m running on borrowed time might as well rinse every last drop of wine in this grape juice youth I’ve been blessed to get every second is a death in its own vignette every stress on my breath it could melt away even if only for a moment I taste this shattering plans change, I change my range stretches in obsession yes I’m out of the loop, out of the group, out on the roof, with the moon, and I’m chasing it
5.
*window opens* *wind rushes through, humming melodically* *drum loop plays* *drum solo* *rushing wind noise is reversed, reverb added* *window closes*
6.
I’m shattered in a glass house need to get to sleep stone’s throw from a bad dream we could never be safe here splinter footed half step bruk up mi feet mek di next step weaker we could never be safe here all haffi tread, but some with bare feet I fall to my knees the shards are deadly, hard and heavy in the sunshine I still feel the snow, it grinds against me -- out of the loop, out of the group, out on the roof, with the moon, no shirt, no shoes, no hope, no clue how to do this clueless, foolish even too naïve and true believing who could see us making stained glass from the wounds and leaving windows maskless? bun your praxis, we’re too fractured practise flux, erratic, tactless tacit truth define in absence ah shit, we could never be safe here if we keep all our view of who we are in constant breaking antifragile
7.
I can be fragile that’s alright I can be hurt and it’s alright, that it’s not alright -- tears carve faces like valleys the tundra erupts in a violent storm I tell myself the blizzard is normal in the clattering, grinding, biting jaw my teeth shatter I tell myself they are sharpened for war I don’t want to feel the ground
8.
008-NOSPACE 01:00
ain’t no space to exist in the chainmail let alone full plate armour I gotta be harder, innit? -- we are taught to be strong we ain’t taught to be wrong
9.
009-NOTLOST 01:00
bodily building in disrepair without inhabitant paradox stable as a derelict entity envious of felled willows who don’t have to get up again buttress of kitchen floor, cuttlefish camouflage attempted a sticky one, I think I still exist dissociation grey, not my favourite shade of wallpaper, plastered on reality in several lumpy layers that smother cupboards, appliances and furniture in chaos hard to wash the dishes when the blade is remnant in the stillness of the storm's eye, hollowness blossoms roots consume questions when they're lost and forgotten petals dipped in burgundy or bright red machismo lusted after by aggression ego stuffing alter-ego into pillowcases his carcass is slept on, disregarded, unequated
10.
010-NOTIME 01:00
come too far I’ve -- there’s no time to say what I want to say my voice was stolen by the thunder my body is a temple to the saint of self-destruction wipe my eyes like it never happened antifragile, stronger when you break me wait? my ability to pick up the pieces does not justify being shattered it is a survival mechanism not a birth right it is a product of limited time
11.
011-NOTGONE 01:00
I’ve come to far I learned to fly I’ve come to know I won’t survive
12.
staring at the green sky after a thunderstorm, grey clouds dancing and collapsing, falling down in flames I'm looking for the moon my anchor, my mirror to the sun, whispering like a ghost in the daylight I'm always chasing that which hides, never closing my eyes to feel the emerald fire on my skin the warmth of the glow; impermanent but in this moment it is the only thing that's real
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about

‘oneminuteglitches’ is a collection of one-minute video-poems navigating anxiety, vulnerability, and a loss of control.

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released June 29, 2020

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about

Samiir Saunders Birmingham, UK

I’m a multimedia poet based in Brum. I am obsessed with communication, compassion, intimacy, and the Internet.

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